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An Olive Branch With Thorns

 

Angie has the Easter Bunny hand paw delivering invitations to her "Greek Easter" celebration. Whitney receives her invitation on the street, Lisa is given hers while filming a confessional, and Heather let's out a terrified scream when she discovers the creepy bunny waiting in the backseat of her car. Not since the Lisa Rinna and Kim Richards beef has a bunny been so relevant.

 

Witless Rose and her bitch, Justin, are enjoying their first "date night" in months; that is until Justin starts complaining about how overwhelmed he is since rejoining the work force.  But Whitney feels like she’s the one who’s really overwhelmed, citing a particular morning where she had to feed two kids, clean up dog pee, and throw in a load of laundry ... all in the same morning!  I guess that's what Justin gets for sharing his feelings with his wife.

 

Lisa and Angie go to a place called the Wick Lab to make their very own candles. While they’re there, one of the employees asks Lisa if she’s Jack Barlow’s mom, and she finds out that the girl, a friend of Jack’s, knew about his mission trip before she did. Poor Lisa, the hits just keep coming.  When they change the subject to discuss Angie’s Easter party, Angie tells Lisa that Meredith is not invited.  This triggers Lisa, because although she doesn't condone Meredith's behavior, she is still trying to make up with her, so she's kind of stuck in the middle between two friends.  But when Angie tells that Monica IS invited, Lisa just can't contain herself. She then tells Angie that Monica was the one who actually said the rumor about Shawn, so she shouldn’t be invited either.

 

 

Speaking of our savior rising, we’re back at the blessed Mary Cosby’s hideously decorated house, Kelly green carpeting intact, and enough gold leaf to cover a Vegas casino.  Finally, we see Mary asking her son point blank, if he’ is indeed actually married.  The (mentally challenged?) kid responds, “I mean, kinda, yeah ... ", and then admits that he and his girlfriend went to the courthouse a year ago.  Mary seems to vaguely remember him being dressed up and in a rush. She tries to excuse her blatent idiocy (of not knowing) by saying that he and his girlfriend stay on a different "wing" of the house, so they rarely see each other.  Sounds like total bullshit, but considering the (disturbing) way her dog snarls and won't even come in the same room with the kid, I guess it's believable.  Mary then fake cries that her only son got married without her knowing about it!  Incidentally, on her recent disastrous appearance on WWHL, she revealed that she thinks Robert Jr. forgot about some paperwork which would make the marriage null and void.  Personally, I'd be just praying that they don't breed. 

 

Later, Meredith stops by for what seems like a production-driven intervention about Mary’s refusal to participate in just about anything with the cast.  Mary says that she thought there would have been improvement and growth in the group, but has not seen any, and therefore has no intention of gracing them with her presence.  When Mary learns that Meredith wasn't invited to Angie's Easter gathering, she says that she's not going either.  Then just moments before the party begins, Mary calls Angie letting her know that she can’t come because her house in Vegas flooded ... wait for it ... a year ago. But it’s finally been fixed, so she’s going there now.  To my delight, Angie basically says "Oh that's too bad ... gotta go.", and then promptly removes the place card from her gorgeous table.

 

 

As everybody else begins filing into the party, Heather gives Angie a bowl of nine lemons, whatever that was supposed to mean. Was she paying homage to Yolanda, to Shannon, to Dorit's Capri room at Joe Bucas?  Maybe Andy will ask at the reunion.  As Shawn greets Heather, she asks, “Where do you get all your custom clothes?"  Without missing a beat he replies, “My gay boyfriend.”  Angie is a great addition to the show and having a hot deliciously snarky hubby is definitely an added plus.  Let's talk about Shawn for a sec.  He is obviously leading a totally heterosexual life with Angie, but my gut tells me that he has dabbled in the past.  Will or would he again?  Probably, just not in SLC.  Looking at him packed into those (very flattering) pants at the party, it would be a shame to think he isn't spreading that thing around somewhere.

 

I have to say, I'm loving this party; not just because they are celebrating Jesus' resurrection, but because Real Housewife parties that are usually thrown for the sole purpose of being filmed, but this feels genuinely real.  We’re so accustomed to these parties, scarcely attended by those who are contractually obligated to be there, but this one has real loved ones, friends, and the ladies actually brought their families.  Of course, we all know that it probably isn't really Easter Sunday as they're filming this, but that's beside the point.  

 

Remember how Lisa freaked out about Heather extending an olive branch to Angie last week? Well naturally, Whtiney couldn't wait to tell Heather about it, so Heather pulls Lisa aside for some clarification. After some discussion about how "surfacy" their friendship is, Heather says that she wishes they could talk about Jack’s mission in a constructive way. But that’s not something Lisa is open to that at all, saying that Heather’s experience with being Mormon differs greatly from her family’s.  After listening to Shrek's tyrade against the church in a confessional, Lisa finally tells Heather something that I've been waiting for her to say since last season, or really since the RHOSLC started ... "Look, you wrote a book about being a bad Mormon, I want Jack to be a good Mormon".

 

While all of this drama is happening, we get a quick scene of Meredith and Brooks in L.A. for the GLAAD Awards, presumably the previous night.  It's not clear why they are there; apparently bearing a gay son is somehow award-worthy.  In a confessional, Meredith reminds us that Brooks likes the D, so she, of all people, would never spread gay rumors about Shawn.  BTW, I wasn't aware that Meredith actually has THREE kids, another son who apparently doesn't want to be on television. 

 

Angie seems to finally be coming around, realizing that the rumor actually came from Monica and not Meredith, so Easter Sunday be damned, now is as good a time as any to confront her about it. Monica admits that she was basically just guessing to what Meredith was alluding to since that’s the rumor that’s been going around the “Salt Lake City streets” for years. Angie says that she’s heard plenty of rumors about Monica, but that doesn’t mean she spreads them. But vague threats don’t work on Monica, who’s a pro at getting ahead of the story. “What do you got? Foreclosure? Check! Divorce? Check! Affair? Check!”  I hate to give the bitch props, she is a master at disarming her enemy.

 

As the conversation heats up, Monica’s mother, the always entertaining Linda ("LD"), takes it upon herself to pull up a chair and encourages them to bury the hatchet, although her childish daughter is doing all the hatchet throwing.  Since Angie can’t really go after Monica with her mother sitting right there, she puts a pin in the conversation. So instead (and to the other guest's entertainment), an argument breaks out between Monica and Linda!  Linda tries to calm Monica down, reminding her that they're guests in someone's home, but Monica is annoyed that her mother is taking someone else’s side.  But I'm seeing a lot more going on here than meets the eye.  First of all, Monica doesn’t need her mother over her shoulder while she’s at work making good reality television, and certainly doesn't need her horning in on HER moment.

 

 

But the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree, and while we all know how complex mother-daughter relationships can be, but LD is proving herself to be quite the reality TV star in her own right.  Even so, leaving her mother alone at a party full of strangers was a bit much.