Real Housewives of NJ Recap

"Kiss My Peach"

The Gorgas are celebrating Joe's birthday at their spectacular Jersey Shore home.  In the next scene, Teresa is arriving late (as usual) to join them and Melissa's fambly for Joe's birthday dinner in Tom's River, a quaint resort town presumably near the Jersey Shore.  After completely inappropriate dinner table talk about pineapples and peaches making women taste good, Tre announces she's having a pool party on the following Wednesday.  Predictably, the conversation shifts to the invitation list and Joe finally grows a pair seizes the moment and tells Teresa that it's time to end Teresa and Jackie's tiresome feud, and  insists that she invite Jackie to the party.  Tre finally gives in, but can't bring herself to include Jackie in the group text invitation, so she hands her phone over to Melissa.  BTW, is it just me or does anyone else STILL feel the tension in the room whenever Teresa and the Gorgas film together?



Margaret has inked a "very lucrative" book deal with Simon and Schuster to pen her memoir, and in true housewife fashion, has hired a ghostwriter.  While reflecting on her life has been a very cathartic experience, drumming up certain not-so-pretty memories is proving to be quite painful.  Marge has already unapologetically revealed to the girls (and a few million viewers) that she slept her way to the top, but as she repeats this admisson to her ghostwriter, she dives in a little deeper and explains that it was actually Marge Senior's sluttiness  sexual freedom that ingrained "the importance of sexuality and looking good" in her.  The ghostwriter tries to bail her out by reminding us that there was no "me too" movement during the groovy 1970's.  Whatever, I'm not judging, and something tells me that this book is going to be a really juicy read!

Dullores and Dr. David are still going through it.  She tells David that he is disappointed that she is now rehabbing her own home because he expected her to move into the new home that she designed for "them".  He nods in agreement, obviously just to shut her up (a real catch, that one).  However we did actually see them kiss, ok peck on the mouth (twice!) in this scene, so maybe these two crazy kids stand a chance after all.



It's the day of Teresa's pool party and all eyes are on Joe Gorga and Jonathan, but let me back it up a moment.  It seems Michelle (Jonathan's wife who just happens to be Teresa's real estate agent) told Jennifer that Joe owe's Jonathan tens of thousands of dollars.  Jonathan believes that he and Joe were official partners when they held events together promoting Joe's book Joe Gorga's Guide to Success, but Joe maintains they never had any contract.  Sounds shady to me, but Jonathan seemingly bought it .... beef squashed.  I guess the opportunity to appear on RHONJ, not to mention Michelle's potential $100K commission on the selling ofTeresa's McMansion was enough compensation after all (I did the math).



Back to Tre's pool party.  Jackie is a no show after allegedly texting back a "shove your invititation up your ass" to Teresa (I can so see her doing that); so between that and Joe and Jonathan's much ado about nothing, it's up to Jennifer to provide the entertainment.  The girls all jump in the pool and begin a game of Tequila pong with Tony the pool guy.  It isn't long before Jen is slurring, completely incoherent, and landing face down on the Tre's new cool deck concrete.  Everyone is laughing but Margaret, as she is becoming increasingly worried about Jen's over indulging.  Dr. Bill finally gets off his own ass, scoops his wife up and literally carries her to the car.

Next week, we finally see and Teresa and Jackie in the same room and it looks like the story of Evan's  cheating may actually have legs.  Stay tuned and sound off below! ;